Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Lets play a game called de-virginize the ginger Responses (1)

Please tell me your ad is a joke. Seriously.
My ad is no joke. Are you interested in rocking my world?
Ha, not at your mom's house!
You are absolutely correct. As much as she is a HUGE part of my life there is no room for her when I am sexing up some lovely ladies.

New game plan.
How about a romantic dinner at Red Lobster, followed by drinks at the bar and then we head off to a sleezy pay by the hour motel WHERE WE GIT IT ON!!!!!! I will bring the rubber sheets, barry white cd's and possibly my batman costume.
lol, ok

Should I pick you up on my scooter (I will bring an extra helmet) or do you want to meet at the restaurant?
I hear chicks dig guys who ride bikes is that true?

BTW I was just kidding about the rubber sheets ... but not the batman costume. Any chance you are a fan of catwoman? MEOW!

Here is a picture of me from a few years back, I fill that suit out a little bit better these days and my hair is much shorter.
wow, i see why you're still a virgin living at your mom's house!
Wow that was kind of rude.
Lets see a pic of you, It will probably explain why you are looking through craigslist personals.
Actually I have had good luck both on and off of craigslist. The reason I'm on here is because I don't like picking up guys in bars, and at my job 98% of the employees are female.
So ya gonna let me tap that or what?
I'm going to say or what...

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Lets play a game called de-virginize the ginger

Socially awkward skinny red head looking for an older woman to show me the ropes and rock my world. I was thinking my mother could cook us a wonderful dinner and we could follow that up with a few wine coolers on the porch. After my mother falls asleep the fun can finally begin ... Although I am technically still a virgin I feel that I have watched enough porn on the internet to be a fairly competent lover.

I enjoy playing World of Warcraft, collecting unique soda bottles, and and I am a semi-professional table tennis player. (ping pong).

Send me a picture and I will send you mine.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

ISO someone who can sound like Shia LeBeouf Responses

So far everyone has been very helpful and informative. I expected to receive a lot of hate mail but I am pleasantly surprised by the responses. Its nice to see so many good hearted people willing to give any help that they can. This may be my first post that stays up for the full 30 days.

Why not try and talk to shia's agent set up a phone conference for real. find his agent and send him an email or a call. Give her the real thing. Teresa Dahlquist is his agent at the Beverly Hecht Agency.
Beverly Hecht Agcy
3500 W Olive Ave Ste 1180
Burbank, CA 91505
Hi, I ran across your ad on CL, and it was extremely heart touching. I don't think you were a terrible father, just someone doing something...anything, to get a child in a terrible situation to smile. I may have done something similar if I were in that situation.
Although I don't think I could pull something like that off, I was wondering if you had ever considered contacting the Make A Wish Foundation about actually trying to make this happen, instead of faking it. I do volunteer work with them, and a child does not need to be terminal to have a wish granted, however I'm not sure of the criteria that needs to be met. It would be worth giving them a call.
If you're interested, you can call Andrea Kobernik in the Milwaukee offices, and ask her to point you in the right direction. Here is her information.
Andrea, Special Events Coordinator
Make-A-Wish Foundation of Wisconsin
13195 W. Hampton Ave.
Butler, Wisconsin 53007
Phone: 262.781.****
Fax: 262.781.****

Hope I helped a bit....good luck.
Hi my name is Joey, sorry to hear about your daughter. I can’t image what you all must be going through. I’m about the same age and build as Shia not exactly sure how much I sound like him but I will try to listen to his voice and record my own to see if there’s enough resemblance. I would like to help out if possible. Have you tried to contact him in any way? I could pool some resources and see if there’s any possibility getting in contact with him although it does seem like a long shot. I know some independent film makers and local artists, I could also contact the Milwaukee Independent Film board and try to get a request for help put out there. If he’s anything like me he would be willing to consider it. I don’t want to get your hopes up in any way but I saw your post and had to respond. If there’s anything I can do to help I’d be willing. Feel free to call me with any suggestions or questions, I can be reached at 414-254-**** There has to be something we can do! Although even being able to meet him will just be a temporary lift, she’ll need to find meaning, acceptance, and passion for what life has to offer her in the future. I wish you all the best and I hope I can help in some way. Take care and be positive things will get better if you stay strong.
i saw your post and am sympathetic for your situation. I am a professional actor and can tell you that IMDB database has links to contact representation of talent. If you look into that you may be able to contact LeBoufs agent and may be able to work something out. I am not 100% positive that it will work but it is worth a shot.

Monday, July 13, 2009

ISO someone who can sound like Shia LeBeouf

Please don't judge me.
I know this is a horrible thing to do but my little girl has lost so much already and I would like to see her smile again ... even if it is only for one day.

About a year ago my daughter developed a rare form of ocular cancer called Retinoblastoma. Tumors developed in both of her eyes and the only way to save her life was to remove them. While she was in the hospital she watched a lot of movies and developed a little crush on Shia LeBeouf after watching the Disney movie Holes. (she LOVED the book)

Since the operation she has been extremely depressed and rarely leaves her room. We take her to therapy 3 times a week but it does not appear to have any real impact on her mood. Desperate times call for desperate measures and about a week ago I uttered the stupidest thing I have said in my adult life.

I talked with Shia LeBeouf's people and he would be delighted to meet you.

I know - I am a terrible father. But for the first time in over 6 months I saw my baby girl smile. In order to avoid her hating me for the rest of my life I have to deliver Shia.

I need someone who can sound/talk like Shia.
Looks are unimportant.
3-4 hours of talking about your "Shia's" life. (You can make a few things up but you will have to do some research)
Pull it off and name your price.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Big $$ for your kids macaroni necklaces responses

Pedro's triumphant return to craigslist kinda fell flat. Only 3 people responded and the post got removed multiple times. I am trying it one last time but its not looking good.


Brad T
you must be some sort of real piece of shit preying on your moms death this has to be the worst post ive ever seen on cl i think your moms probably rite about you what a piece of shit you are

If this is a seriuos posting then,I have tons of artwork for you a bucka pice, real authentic ll\ooking,lemme know thanx !

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Big $$ for your kids macaroni necklaces

My Mother is dying and I couldn't be happier.
That bitch cut me out of her will because as she so eloquently puts it "Pedro you are a fat, drunken, worthless, drug addicted, good for nothing, pile of dogshit"

That was until she developed dementia.
Every time I visit her in the nursing home she thinks that I am 6 years old again. If I implant the idea that her innocent little boy will be penniless and on the street I can get her to change the will to include me again.

What I need is some art projects made by a child.
I plan on giving them to my mother over a couple days to soften her up a bit. I have tried to make some already but they look too nice, These need to be authentic looking.

Will trade for cash or maybe a few pieces from the estate.